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Sunday, April 4, 2010

Smile: It is good for health

Here are some definitions which will bring smile in your face and may also make you to think.
Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool at the other end.
Marriage: It is an agreement wherein a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains    her masterS.
Lecture: An art of transmitting information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of students without passing through the minds of either.
Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number of persons present
Compromise: The art of dividing the cake in such a way that everybody believes he/she got the biggest piece
Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine will power is defeated by feminine water-power.
Dictionery: A place where divorce comes before marriage

Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagree later on.
Ecstacy: A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before
Classic: A book, people praise but never read

Smile: A curve that can set lot of things straight.
Office: A place you can relax after your strenuous home life
Yawn: The only time when some married  men  ever get to open their mouth

Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide nothing can be done together.
Experience: The name men give to their mistakes
Atom Bomb: An invention to bring an end to all inventions
Philosopher: A fool torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead
Diplomat: A person who tell you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip
Opportunist: A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river
Optimist: A person who, while faliing from Eiffel Tower says in midway, " See I am not injured yet!"
Pessimist: A person who says O is the last letter in ZERO, instead of the first letter in OPPORTUNITY
Miser: A person who lives poor so that he can die RICH
Father: A banker provided by Nature.
Criminal: A guy no different from the other, unless he gets caught
Boss: Some one who was early when you are late, and late when you are early
Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence later
Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by his bills

Contributed by Mr. Bhaskaran Sivaraman

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