Believers Vs. Non believers: A judge's dilemma

In a small town, a person decided to open up a brothel, which was right opposite to a church. 




The church & its congregation started a campaign to block the brothel from opening with 


petitions and prayed daily against his business.



Work progressed. However, when it was almost complete and was about to open a few days 


later, a strong lightning struck the brothel and it was burnt to the ground.

The church folks were rather smug in their outlook after that, till the brothel owner sued the 


church authorities on the grounds that the church through its congregation & prayers was 


ultimately responsible for the destruction of his brothel, either through direct or indirect 


actions or means.

In its reply to the court, the church vehemently denied all responsibility or any connection that 


their prayers were reasons for the act of God. As the case made its way into court, the judge 


looked over the paperwork at the hearing and commented:

'I don't know how I'm going to decide this case, but it appears from the paperwork, we have a 


brothel owner who believes in the power of prayer and we have an entire church that doesn't.' 

 Anonymous said...

Nice.

Varadarajan

April 13, 2012 8:41 AM

 ChatterBox said...

lol... good one

April 19, 2012 12:17 AM

World today

 sampath kumar said...

A telling commentary on a soulless polity of the world

January 25, 2012 9:27 PM

If the younger generation is interested

from the face book

Learn a lesson with smile !

THE SUCCESS OF MARRIAGE

Once upon a time a married couple celebrated their 25th marriage anniversary. They had become famous in the city for not having a single conflict in their period of 25 years. Local newspaper editors had gathered at the occasion to find out the secret of their well known "happy going marriage".

Editor: "Sir. It's amazingly unbelievable. How did you make this possible?"

Husband recalling his old honeymoon days said: "We had been to Shimla for honeymoon after marriage. Having selected the horse riding finally, we both started the ride on different horses. My horse was pretty okay but the horse on which my wife was riding seemed to be a crazy one. On the way ahead, that horse jumped suddenly, making my wife topple over. Recovering her position from the ground, she patted the horse's back and said "This is your first time". She again climbed the horse and continued with the ride. After a while, it happened again. This time she again kept calm and said "This is your second time" and continued. When the horse dropped her third time, she silently took out the revolver from the purse and shot the horse dead!!


I shouted at my wife: "What did you do you psycho. You killed the poor animal. Are you crazy?" 
.
She gave a silent look and said: "This is your first time!!!"."

Husband:" That's it. We are happy ever after. " 





Sent by Ms. Mathasngi

 BHASKARAN19 said...

Let us not show this to our..... they may not allow even first time.

August 26, 2011 4:43 PM

Even God has a Sense of Humour!!

God was in the process of creating the universe.
And he was explaining to his subordinates "Look everything should be in balance. For example, after every 10 deer there should be a lion.

Look here my fellow angels, here is the country of the United States.I have blessed them with prosperity and money.But at the same time I have given them insecurity and tension....

And here is Africa. I have given them beautiful nature.But at the same time, I have given them climatic extremes.


And here is South America. I have given them lots of forests.But at the same time, I have given them lesser land so that they would have to cut off the forests...So you see fellows, everything should be in balance.

One of the angels asked..."God, what is this extremely beautiful country here?"

God said....... "Ahah...that is the crown piece of all. "INDIA",My most precious creation.It has understanding and friendly People.
Sparkling streams and serene mountains.A culture which speaks of the great tradition that they live.Technologically brilliant and with a heart of gold.....

The angel was quite surprised:"But god you said everything should be in balance."

God replied -- "Look at the neighbours I gave them."


Sent by Mr. Bhaskaran

 Saras said...

You got me in splits1 I am still laughing.

August 24, 2011 5:51 AM

Why America is in this position?

A naked & drunken woman boards a cab in US. Driver of the cab, a Gujju, keeps staring at her and does not start the cab.


Woman: Haven't you seen a naked woman before?


Gujju: Cool down. I am not staring at you. I am just wondering where you have kept the money to pay me?


Moral of the story: This is what most of the American banks failed to do. Assessing the repayment capacity before enjoying exposure

Sent by Mr. Seshadri Srinivasan

 Hemalatha said...

Great One that was ! Enjoyed it and forwarded it to a few Credit Officers as well. Hope they contribute whatever is possible and save India. Regards

August 12, 2011 11:17 PM

No more "old", but "Youthfully challenged"

An old German Shepherd  starts chasing rabbits and before long, discovers that he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a panther heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch.   The old German Shepherd thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep shit now!"     Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the panther is about to leap, the old German Shepherd exclaims loudly,     "Boy, that was one delicious panther! I wonder, if there are any more around here?"   Hearing this, the young panther halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees.     "Whew!," says the panther, "That was close! That old German Shepherd nearly had me!"   Meanwhile, a squirrel who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the panther. So, off he goes.   The squirrel soon catches up with the panther, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the panther.   The young panther is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here, squirrel, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!"   Now, the old German Shepherd sees the panther coming with the squirrel on his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?," but instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old German Shepherd says...     "Where's that squirrel? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another panther!"   Moral of this story...   Don't mess with the old dogs... Age and skill will always overcome youth and treachery! Bull Shit and brilliance only come with age and experience.   If you don't tell this to five 'old' friends right away, there will be five fewer people laughing in the world.   Of course, I am in no way insinuating that you are old, just 'youthfully challenged'.   You did notice the size of the print, didn't you?

Sent by Mr. Anatharaman

 Ananth said...

Very good one, really enjoyed this one. Thanks for sharing!

August 1, 2011 4:51 AM

Many human beings in our country have to learn from this

 BHASKARAN19 said...

சிரிப்ப‌தா அல்ல‌து சிந்திக்க‌வா என்று தெரிய‌வில்லை

July 29, 2011 7:03 AM

Three kick rule

A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural Tennessee. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing.

The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell in this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it."

The old farmer replied, "This is my property, and you are not coming over here."

The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in the United States and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own.

The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we settle disputes in Tennessee. We settle small disagreements like this with the "Three Kick Rule."

The lawyer asked, "What is the Three Kick Rule?"

The Farmer replied, "Well, because the dispute occurs on my land, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times and so on back and forth until someone gives up."

The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom.

The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the attorney. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel toed work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees. His second kick to the midriff sent the lawyer's last meal gushing from his mouth.

The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer's third kick to his rear end sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie. The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet. Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, "Okay, you old fart. Now it's my turn."

The old farmer smiled and said, "Naw, I give up. You can have the duck."

Lesson: When you are educated, you will believe only half of what you hear. When you are intelligent, you know which half.


Sent by Mr. Bhaskaran

A complaint letter

COMPLAINT LETTER TO THE RAILWAYS IN 1909!!!

 

---

Okhil Babu's letter to the Railway  department:  

---

I am arrive by passenger train Ahmedpur station and my belly is too much swelling with jackfruit. I am therefore went to privy. Just I doing the nuisance that guard making whistle blow for train to go off and I am running with lotaah in one hand and dhoti in the next when I am fall over and expose all my shocking to man and female women on platform. I am got leaved at Ahmedpur station. This too much bad, if passenger go to make dung that dam guard not wait train five minutes for him. I am therefore pray your honour to make big fine on that guard for public sake. Otherwise I am making big report to papers.

Okhil Chandra Sen wrote this letter to the Sahibganj divisional railway office in 1909. It is on display at the Railway Museum in New Delhi. It was also reproduced under the caption Travellers Tales in the Far Eastern Economic Review.

Any guesses why this letter is of historic value?

.
..

It led to the introduction of TOILETS in trains in India.....!!!!

---

  So please don't think any idea is stupid and discard it.  Always Speak up. 

Harisankar said...

such a thing had to happen for the idea of toilets in train!? the raj was retard or something!.

June 18, 2011 10:57 PM

BHASKARAN19 said...

But the fact remains even after 12 years of introduction - the toilets are badly maintained, stinking, no water. This was highlighted in ANNIYAN also, but we see movies only for entertainment and we do not take the real message. regards bhaskaran

June 19, 2011 7:03 AM

Do not drive your kid to this.................

I was strolling in the gardens of an insane asylum when I met a young man who was reading a philosophy book.

His behavior and his evident good health made him stand out from the other inmates.

I sat down beside him and asked:

‘What are you doing here?’

He looked at me, surprised. But seeing that I was not one of the doctors, he replied:

‘It’s very simple. My father, a brilliant lawyer, wanted me to be like him.

“My uncle, who owns a large emporium, hoped I would follow his example.

“My mother wanted me to be the image of her beloved father.

“My sister always set her husband before me as an example of the successful man.

“My brother tried to train me up to be a fine athlete like himself.

“And the same thing happened at school, with the piano teacher and the English teacher – they were all convinced and determined that they were the best possible example to follow.

“None of them looked at me as one should look at a man, but as if they were looking in a mirror.

“So I decided to enter this asylum. At least here I can be myself.’

Sent by Mr. Seshadri Srinivasan

Consulting

Once upon a time there was a shepherd sitting on the side of a deserted road. Suddenly a brand new Porsche screeches to a halt. The driver, a man dressed in an Armani suit, Cerutti shoes, Ray-Ban sunglasses, TAG-Heuer wrist-watch, and a Pierre Cardin tie, gets out and asks the Shepherd: "If I can tell you how many sheep you have, will you give me one of them?" The shepherd looks at the young man, and then looks at the large flock of grazing sheep and replies: "Okay." The young man parks the car, connects his laptop to the mobile-fax, enters a NASA Webster, scans the ground using his GPS, opens a database and 60 Excel tables filled with logarithms and pivot tables, then prints out a 150 page report on his high-tech mini-printer. He turns to the shepherd and says, "You have exactly 1,586 sheep here." The shepherd cheers," That's correct, you can have your sheep." The young man makes his pick and puts it in the back of his Porsche.

The shepherd looks at him and asks: "If I guess your profession, will you return my animal to me?" The young man answers, "Yes, why not". The shepherd says, "You are an IT consultant ".How did you know?" asks the young man.

"Very simple," answers the shepherd. "First, you came here without being called. Second, you charged me a fee to tell me something I already knew, and third, you don't understand anything about my business.. Now can I have my COW back


sent by Mr. Seshadri Srinivasan

Hemalatha said...

Dear Sir, Wonderful ! This is the truth. Thanks for sharing. Regards.

May 10, 2011 8:32 PM

Learn a lesson

A group of children were playing near two railway tracks, one still in use while the other disused. Only one child played on the disused track, the  rest on the operational track.

The train is coming, and you are just beside the track interchange. You can make the train change its course to the disused track and save most of the kids. However, that would also mean the lone child playing by the disused track would be sacrificed. Or would you rather let the train go its way?   

Let's take a pause to think what kind of decision we could make................

                                    ********

Most people might choose to divert the course of the train, and sacrifice only one child. You might think the same way, I guess. Exactly, I thought the same way initially because to save most of the children at the expense of only one child was rational decision most people would make, morally and emotionally. But, have you ever thought that the child choosing to play on the disused track had in fact made the right decision to play at a safe place?

Nevertheless, he had to be sacrificed because of his ignorant friends who chose to play where the danger was. This kind of dilemma happens around us everyday. In the office, community, in politics and especially in a democratic society, the minority is often sacrificed for the interest of the majority, no matter how foolish or ignorant the majority are, and how farsighted and knowledgeable the minority are. The child who chose not to play with the rest on the operational track was sidelined. And in the case he was sacrificed, no one would shed a tear for him.

The great critic Leo Velski Julian who told the story said he would not try to change the course of the train because he believed that the kids playing on the operational track should have known very well that track was still in use, and that they should have run away if they heard the train's sirens. If the train was diverted, that lone child would definitely die because he never thought the train could come over to that track! Moreover, that track was not in use probably because it was not safe. If the train was diverted to the track, we could put the lives of all passengers on board at stake! And in your attempt to save a few kids by sacrificing one child, you might end up sacrificing hundreds of people to save these few kids.

While we are all aware that life is full of tough decisions that need to be   made, we may not realize that hasty decisions may not always be the right one.

"Remember that what's right isn't always popular... and what's popular isn't always right." 

Everybody makes mistakes; that's why they put erasers on pencils  

Don't look away when a woman is talking to you !

Anonymous said...

great video

May 6, 2011 11:03 PM

The trick of asking questions

Jack and Max are walking from religious service. Jack wonders whether it
would be all right to smoke while praying.

Max replies, "Why don't you ask the Priest?" 

So Jack goes up to the Priest and asks, "Priest, may I smoke while I
pray?" But the Priest says, "No, my son, you may not. That's utter
disrespect to our religion."

Jack goes back to his friend and tells him what the good Priest told him.
Max says, "I'm not surprised. You asked the wrong question. Let me try." 

And so Max goes up to the Priest and asks, "Priest, may I pray while I
smoke?" To which the Priest eagerly replies, "By all means, my son...by
all means."

Moral of the story: The reply you get depends on the question you ask. 


sent by Anantaraman Tarakkad  Mahadevan
raja said...
that's called presentation.nice one

February 21, 2011 5:40 AM

Will you please read this, Arundhati Roy?

A Kashmiri, a reporter and a tough old soldier were captured by terrorists in Kashmir . The leader of the terrorists told them he'd grant each of them one last request before they were beheaded and dragged naked through the streets.
 
The Kashmiri said, 'Well, I'm a foodie, so I'd like one last plate of tandoori chicken.' 
 
The leader nodded to an underling who left and returned with the Chicken. The tourist ate it all and said, 'Now I can die content.' 
The reporter said, 'I'm a reporter to the end. I want to take out my tape recorder and describe the scene here and what's about to happen. Maybe, someday, someone will hear it and know that I was on the job till the end.'
The leader directed an aide to hand over the tape recorder and the reporter dictated his comments. 
He then said, 'Now I can die happy.' 
 
The leader turned to the soldier and asked, 'And now, Havaldarji, what is your final wish? 
 
'Kick me in the backside,' said the soldier.

'What?' asked the leader, 'Will you mock us in your last hour?' 
 
'No, I'm NOT kidding. I want you to kick my backside ,' insisted the soldier. 
 
So the leader shoved him into the yard and kicked him in the bottom. 
The soldier went sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9 mm pistol from inside his cammies and shot the leader dead. 
In the resulting confusion, he emptied his sidearm on six terrorists, then with his knife he slashed the throat of one, and with an AK-47, which he took from one of the already dead terrorists, sprayed the rest of the terrorists killing another 11. In a flash, all of them were either dead or fleeing for their lives. 

As the soldier was untying the Kashmiri and the reporter, they asked him, 'Why didn't you just shoot them all in the first place? Why did you ask him to kick you in the ass?' 
 
'What?' replied the soldier, 'and have you two assholes report that I was the aggressor..?'

......... such is the irony of Indian Democracy.......................... 

kaakaikuruvi said...

jingoist you...

November 8, 2010 4:13 PM

hvaidya said...

As per Oxford Dictionary: Jingo - a supporter of policies favouring war, a blustering patriot. The story here is against terrorists and persons like Arundhati Roy supporting such people. I will love war against both these people

November 12, 2010 8:01 PM

Anonymous said...

patriotism is the virtue of the vicious --> Oscar Wilde There is no problem that cannot be solved by the working end of an ak 47. My point is we lack pride and will.

May 6, 2011 11:05 PM

Learn a lesson with smile

A man who was making arrangment for celebrating his wife's Birthday by throwing a party, ordered a birthday cake over phone.

The salesman asked him what message he wanted put on the cake.

He thought for a moment and said, put  ""getting older but you are getting better".

The salesman asked "how do you want me to put it?" The man said 'Well...put "You are getting older" at the top and "but you are getting better" at the bottom.'

When the cake was unveiled at the party, all the guests were aghast at the message on the cake.

It read: "You are getting older at the top, but you are getting better at the bottom"

Moral of the Story:

1. Double proof read everything before you send.

2. Don't trust others to write it right for you.

3. Don't order cakes by telephone 

kasangudi kannan said...

you too getting older but of late you select young jokes.okay, carry on.

August 9, 2010 3:43 PM hvaidya said... Dear Mr. Kannan, I feel, as you grow old, it is very important to be mentally young.

August 9, 2010 8:58 PM

Harisankar said...

I like the post. In fact I am gonna spread it. Keep youth in your heart and you will never grow old. Keep Rocking.

August 9, 2010 9:47 PM

hvaidya said...

Thanks Mr. Harishankar for encouraging me to be young. I have more youngsters as my friends than of my age and I love their company.

August 10, 2010 8:18 AM

BHASKARAN said...

I have always said Age is only state of mind. Our heart and soul must always think and act young. It is better to ask someone how young you are rather than asking him how old are you?

August 10, 2010 12:33 PM

Harisankar said...

hehe. I have more elders as my friends !! not joking.

August 10, 2010 1:41 PM

Saras said...
Age is like Vintage Wine, It gets better with every passing year!

October 11, 2010 5:07 PM